just over a month since my last post. my spirit is inching its way back to health. i'm still tired. tired of struggling against others' disillusionment, unbelief, and arrogance. tired of struggling with my own short temper. how can i defend what doesn't want or need my defense. i need some defending. my God, why don't you rise up? maybe you're up and well, and i just don't see. in that case, i've never felt so alone and downright stuck. this is not a fun feeling. the end is in sight, but it's still and miniscule and tiny light at this point.
i'd love to know the next step soon. soon. i will be where God is, and this will soon be someone else's charge. someone more qualified than me...with more experience in letting yes be yes and no be no, more grace, and hopefully someone with support. unfailing support. God, let them have a firm foundation and unfailing love.
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